Plaid Piracy




You went to school to learn girl
things you never knew before
like I before E except after C and why 2 plus 2 makes 4
now, now, now
I’m gonna teach you, teach you, teach you
all about love girl, all about love
sit yourself down, take a seat
all you gotta do is repeat after me

A B C , Its easy as
1 2 3 , as simple as
do re mi, A B C, 1 2 3
baby you and me girl


The cruiser slowly towards the lake shore as Donna stood at the helm, the sounds of the Jackson 5 playing over the portable radio that took up half of the seat beside her.  Her tight red t-shirt moved with her body as she steered the boat towards the waiting jetty, glad to be able to make landfall for at least a little while.


The trip was a twenty-first birthday present from her father.  Actually, the boat was, but she had used it as an excuse to take her three friends on a summer cruise around the lakes.  As she moved in time to the music, her hot pants leaving very little to the imagination as he rear moved in time, she was joined on deck by Pattie, her best friend since school days.


“Wonderful – I need to pick up a few things,” she said as she covered her eyes with her hand to look at the approaching jetty.  The red checked cheesecloth blouse she was wearing was not yet secured at the front, so that her light blue bikini top and briefs were still visible.


“Let me get the boat moored first, then we can sort a few things out,” Donna said as she cut the engine and allowed the boat to drift to the jetty side.  “Throw that rope out to the cute looking guy, will you?”


As Pattie picked up the thick coil of rope and threw it to the young man waiting on the wooden platform, Donna turned the radio off and went below deck, where Angie and Kelly were playing a game of cards.  Both girls were wearing bikinis – Angie a red one which barely covered her ample breasts, while Kelly was more demurely dressed – in that at least her cream top covered her breasts and her briefs her bottom.  Both had their hair done in an extravagantly bouffant style, Angie’s brown locks contrasting with Kelly’s blonde hair.


“Have we arrived then,” Kelly said without looking up as Donna picked up a red satin bomber jacket and slipped it over her arms.  The jacket had white elasticised cuffs and trim around the bottom, but even then as Donna zipped up the front it barely covered her large chest, leaving a glimpse of bare breasts visible.  She shook her head to let her long auburn hair fall over her shoulders.


“Yup”, she said as she sat down on a seat, “and Pattie and I are going to pick up some supplies.  You girls want to come?”


“No thanks,” Angie said as she watched Donna pass the long white strings of her espadrilles up her legs in a criss cross pattern, tying them off to the side of her leg just below her knee.  She stretched and yawned as the process was repeated on the other leg, while Pattie came into the cabin and walked past, tying the front edges of her blouse together under her breasts as she did so.  “I fancy spending some time catching the rays on the deck.  What about you, Kelly?”


“I need to get some dinner sorted out,” the other young woman replied as she got to her feet.  As Donna stood up, it was obvious that the extra two inches the cork wedges soles of her sandals gave her height were a good thing.


Pattie came back into the crowded cabin, fastening the front of a pair of blue denim “Daisy Duke” shorts as she did so.  She had also put on a pair of blue denim knee length boots, the heels and soles of which were also two inches thick, and tied a blue bandana over her curly red hair.  “The two sun lovers staying here then?” she said as she picked up a hemp bag.


“Looks that way,” Donna said with a smile.  “We’ll only be an hour or so, OK?”


“Sure, go, have fun,” Kelly replied as she pulled a crocheted poncho over her head, the edges falling over her arms, while Angie followed the two girls up to the deck with a towel draped over her arm.  As the other two carefully disembarked, she laid the blanket over the top of the deck and lay down, a pair of large sunglasses covering her eyes.


Pattie and Donna walked up the jetty, getting admiring looks from the men working there as they did so, while Angie listened to the radio in the galley.  She wasn’t paying a great deal of attention, so she missed the news reader as he began the bulletin.


Top of the news this hour is the raid on the local branch of the First Bank of America.  Three armed raiders struck just as the bank was opening, and made off in a getaway car with a substantial amount of notes.  Police are warning people not to approach...




The three men walked quickly down the jetty, carrying their bags as they boarded the boat that was moored to the opposite side from Donna’s boat.  As two of them took the bags below decks, the third tried to start the engine – with little or no success.


“What’s the problem,” one of them called up from below decks.  Leaving the wheel for a moment, the man went to the rear of the boat and opened a hatch, looking with a growing concern at the engine.


“We must have sprung a leak,” he said as his two companions joined him on deck.  “We’ve got a problem.”


“Maybe,” one of them said as he looked across the jetty at the girl lying on the deck of the boat opposite, “Maybe not.”  The three looked over, their mirrored sunglasses hiding their eyes, before two of them quickly made their way off the boat, the third heading below decks.



“Milk, bread, sun cream...”


Pattie walked down the aisles of the grocery store, the looks from the local boys as they saw her bare midriff and thin body both pleasing to her and slightly worrying to Donna.


“Are you deliberately trying to attract attention to yourself,” she said as she placed some steaks in the basket.


“Says the girl whose butt is barely covered,” Pattie laughed as she looked at her friend in her red hot pants.





Angie opened her eyes when she sensed rather than saw the shadow passing over her face.  She looked up and saw through the glass a man standing over her, so she removed them to see if she could get a better look.  He was about six foot tall, with a thick brown moustache on his upper lip and a blue checked shirt with the sleeves rolled slightly up.  What struck her at first wasn’t that, or his thick sunglasses, but the blue checked bell bottom trousers her was wearing.


“Can I help you?”  She asked as she got up on one elbow, seeing the man smile as she spoke.


“I sure hope so, little lady,” he said as he watched her, “My boat seems to have run out of gas – do you have a spare can I can borrow?”


“I’m not sure,” she said as she sat herself up, “I’m just a guest here, it’s not my boat.  If you can come back in a little while...”


“If it’s all the same to you,” he said as he took a flick knife out of his pocket and held it against Angie’s bare chest, “I’ll wait here.  Stand up, nice and quiet like, and come below deck with me.”


Angie’s eyes widened as he took hold of her arm and pulled her up onto her feet, turning her round so that she was in front of him and pressing the point against her back.  “Let’s not attract attention to ourselves now – just walk down nice and peaceful.”




“Sun getting too much for you,” Kelly said as she heard footsteps coming down into the cabin.  She could hear three people coming down, and assumed the others had returned from their shopping trip.  “Did you manage to get some...”


She stood there as she turned round, the vegetable knife in her hand as she saw Angie standing there, a knife pressed against her throat by one of the two men standing behind her.  The other was wearing a white cotton short sleeved shirt and blue plaid trousers, but the .44 Magnum he was pointing at her as he walked round also took her attention.


“Not a word, doll,” he said as Angie was forced to take a seat at the table, “just put the knife down, nice and gentle, and come over here where we can see you.”


Placing the knife on the chopping board, Kelly slowly raised her hands, the poncho slipping down her arms as she did so, and walked into the central area of the cabin.  “Down on your knees,” the man said, and as she slowly knelt down Angie was forced to join her.


“All right,” the gunman said,” face down on the ground and hands behind your heads.  Bert, see if you can find something to secure these lovely ladies with.”  Angie looked over at her friend as the knife man pulled a coil of thin white rope out of a toolbox and started cutting lengths off it.


“First aid box,” the gunman said as he knelt beside Kelly, “Where is it?”


“In... In the bathroom,” she stammered as the man he had called Bert knelt beside her.


“You go and look, Jack,” he said as he pulled Angie’s wrists down and crossed them in the small of her back, “I’ll take care of things here.  Give Pete a shout as well before you come back.”




An hour later, Donna and Pattie walked back down the jetty, carrying a brown paper bag each and with the bag slung over Pattie’s shoulder.  The sun was starting to set, and the cool air off the lake was keen against Pattie’s bare midriff.


“I told you - you should have worn a jacket,” Donna said, but her friend knew she was only joking.  The red satin jacket she was wearing barely offered more protection than her blouse, and both were still thinking of the admiring looks their choice of clothing had drawn from the younger men – and some of the older ones too.  After all, their breasts were made for men to admire.


At least, that was the view they had as they approached the boat.  “So, where to tomorrow,” Pattie asked as they walked up the wooden panel that allowed them to get back on board.


“Let’s worry about that tomorrow – let’s see what Kelly’s cooked up for dinner,” Donna replied as they climbed the stairway to the entrance to the cabin.  As they started to walk down, they failed to notice the man coming out from behind the small lifeboat and follow them down.


“We’re back, girls,” Donna called out, but the reply was not he “hi” she had expected.  Rather, it was a pair of muffled voices that seemed to be trying to tell them something.


“Girls?” Donna said as she walked into the cabin, only to drop the bag she was carrying at the sight of both Kelly and Angie on the floor, their heads raised as they tried to warn her.


Both girls had their wrists tied together behind their backs, the thin strands of rope cutting into their skin.  They also had their ankles crossed and bound, and lengths of plaster had been stuck over their lips to silence them.  As Pattie walked in behind them, she looked up and saw the two men sat at the table, sunglasses covering their eyes and one of them holding a very large gun towards them.


“You’d better pick that mess up,” one of them said as Donna stared at them, “and your friend really should not try to run – she won’t get far.”


Pattie had turned round, intent on getting away, only to run into the large chest of the man who had followed them down.  Like the other two, he wore sunglasses and had a thick moustache, but he was wearing a tight blue t-shirt and jeans as opposed to the rather more strident clothes of the other two.


“Nice catch, Pete,” the armed man said as the two girls were pushed into the room.  “Why don’t you take these two and make them comfortable in their berths, while I tell our new guests what’s going to happen.”


Pete knelt down, rolled Kelly over and picked her up in his arms, carrying her struggling body to the rear of the cabin where the bunk beds were, as the man who had spoken motioned for Donna and Pattie to join them.  Pattie looked down at Angie, a small damp stain on her bikini briefs, her eyes pleading as she took a seat at the table.


“Don’t worry, girlie,” the gunman said as the other two girls sat down, “we have some special plans to keep you warm.  Bert, go and get the big roll of saran wrap from our boat.”


He stood up to allow the third man to leave, before sitting back and looking at Donna and Pattie.  “Hands on the table, girls, where I can see them,” he said as she sat back.  Donna assumed he was looking at them, as the sunglasses made it impossible to tell, but Angie was starting to shake as she lay face down on the floor.


“Who the hell are you?” Donna said as she stared back at the gunman.


“We need a ride out of town,” the man said as Bert came back with a large roll of clear wrap, “and this is going to be our ride.  In fact, you’re going to be our driver.”


“And what on earth makes you think we’ll cooperate,” Pattie shouted back.  Jack turned to look at her, and she was suddenly sorry she had a skimpy sleeveless blouse on that was tied below her breasts.  She watched him licking her lips as the third man came back in.


“Pete, Bert, help this girl to stand up and get her ready for transport,” Jack said, and Donna looked on as the two men forced Angie to stand up.  She protested through the material that covered her mouth, stuck so well that the contour of her lips was clearly visible, but then shrieked as Bert started to wrap the clear plastic around her legs, taking it slowly up as he passed it round her body.


“While your other friend has a nap at the back,” Pete said as he looked back at them, “We’re going to keep this one somewhere else – insurance in case you want to try something stupid.  Understand?”


Pattie looked over as the wrap passed over Angie’s bottom, the red material of her bikini compressed still further against her skin as Bert continued to pass the wrap up, pinning her arms tightly to her side as he did so.


“Just what are you going to do,” she said as she looked back at the gunman, a smile growing on his lips as he looked back at her.  “That’s going to be a little surprise, girlie – you two done yet?”


“Just finishing, Jack,” the man said as he tore off the wrap and pressed it against
Angie’s neck.  She stood there, mummified in the clear plastic and staring wide eyed at her friends, as she was wrapped in a blanket.  Hoisting her over the shoulder of Bert, she looked back as he carried her up the staircase.  She tried to struggle free, but he ignored her calls as he took her onto the deck.


“Now then,” Jack said as the sound of Bert leaving the boat came through the open window, “Which of you lovely ladies is licensed to drive this boat?2


“That would be me,” Donna said as she stared back at him.  “Good – now, we have one of your friends secured elsewhere, another in the back – why don’t you lovely ladies fix us up a sandwich before the sun sets, hmm?”





The red sun was setting on the horizon as Bert brought the last of the large holdalls over onto Donna’s boat.  Coming down the stairs, he looked at Pattie as she stared back at him.  Pete was standing behind her, passing a length of thin white cord around her crossed wrists as he started to bind them together.


“Ow, that hurts,” she said as she looked over her shoulder at the rope around her arms.  She winced again as he passed the rope between her wrists, pulling the coils tightly around her bare flash and holding them tightly together.


“Look, I’ll do anything, just don’t hurt her,” Donna said as she looked over from the galley.  She had her hands on her head, the bottom of her jacket riding up to reveal her own belly as Pete passed a longer length of rope around her waist, pulling her wrists against her back and going over her belly button.


“Oh, you’ll do exactly what we tell you,” Jack said as he sat back, taking a bite from his sandwich.  “Once we get your friend here nice and comfortable, it should be dark enough for us to make our move.  For now, just be nice and quiet.”


“I’ll be all right, Donna,” Pattie said as she was made to sit down on the floor, her back against the wooden panel of a long seat.  Pete knelt down in front of her and passed a length of rope around her ankles, pulling so tightly that the cord sank into the cotton material of her boots as her ankles were pulled together.


“What’s in the bags,” Donna said as she looked at the four black holdalls sitting on the floor.  “A small bank withdrawal,” Bert said, and the three men started laughing at their own cleverness.


“I don’t get it,” Pattie said as she tried to pull her ankles apart.  Pete smiled, the top lip of his mouth hidden by the facial bristles, as he passed yet another length of rope around her legs above her knees.


“No, you don’t, and that’s good,” Pete said as he offered the plate to Bert.  “Don’t worry, girls – we just need to get away, you’ll be fine unless you try something stupid.  Don’t forget your other friends are still with us.”


On the other boat, Angie was lying on her side, her body covered by a tarpaulin and the cool evening breeze blowing over the blanket that was wrapped around her.  She was wondering when the nightmare was going to end, and why nobody seemed to be coming to her aid.


Kelly was on her bunk, listening to the noises and wondering where they had taken her friend.  The poncho had been gathered around her upper body by the rope that the man had passed around her upper arms, her breasts almost visible between the knots of the wool, but that wasn’t her concern.  That was what was going to happen next.




“All right, Donna,” Pete said as Jack stood up, “We need to make a move.  Bert will cast the rope off while Jack stays down here with your friends.  Oh – I almost forgot.”  Picking up a napkin from the table, he rolled it into a tight band and stood on front of Pattie.  “We can’t have you disturbing us, now can we?  Open wide and say ahh.”


“Look, I promise I’ll be quiet, but please don’t pullmmpph.”  Pattie’s protests were ignored as the cloth was pulled between her lips and around her neck, the two ends secured together behind her back.  She glared up at the man as he laughed at her sitting there, while Donna silently started to cry.


“It’s dark enough Pete”, Jack said as he looked out.


“Excellent – shall we?” he replied as he took Donna by the arm and half led, half dragged her out onto the deck.  As Bert let the ropes slip, he jumped back onboard as the boat slowly drifted out into the deep water.  “Don’t start the engines yet,” Pete whispered into Donna’s ears she stood at the wheel, the barrel of the gun pressed into her back as the boat drifted out onto the still water.




The first that the man manning the jetty knew of the approaching storm was the sight of lights flashing in the distance.  Three police cars drew up, the inhabitants jumping out and flashing their badges at him as they ran towards the boat that was moored at the jetty.



They approached the boat, armed officers covering the side as two plain clothes detectives jumped on board, the jackets of their suits flapping in the breeze.  They made their way cautiously along the deck, where something was lying below a large tarpaulin.  They could just about make out a human body when it suddenly moved.


“Police – don’t move,” one of them shouted as he pointed his gun at the object, only to raise it when he heard what sounded like a female voice making muffled noises underneath.  Nodding, eh watched as his colleague pulled back the tarpaulin to reveal a young woman, wearing a red bikini but mummified in saran wrap, with a length of sticking plaster over her mouth.


“Easy now, easy.” The detective said as he knelt down and peeled the tape away from her mouth.  “What’s your name?”


“Angie,” she croaked as she was helped to sit as best as she could given her covering, “three men came onto our boat and took us hostage.”


“These men – tall, muscular, wearing sunglasses?”


“Yes,” Angie said, “Who were they?”


“Bank robbers,” the other policeman said as uniformed officers came on board.  “Where was your boat?”


“Why it’s – OH MY GOD!!” Angie screamed as she saw the empty berth where their cruiser had been.  “My friends – what about my friends!”


“Calm down, Angie, we’ll find them.  What was the name of the boat?”


“The Lucky Ladies.”


He looked at his partner, who nodded and left the boat, calling in his radio for an ambulance and further back up.




In the centre of the lake, Donna killed the engine and looked at Pete.


“All right, now what,” she said as she held herself to try and keep the cold out of her chest.  Pete just smiled as he looked at the frightened girl, leaving her to wonder what his next move was.


“Let’s take you back down below,” he finally said, “but first we need to get you ready.  Turn round and put your hands behind your back.”


“I should have seen this coming,” Donna said with a resigned air as she did as she was asked and felt the thin cord passed around her own wrists.  As they were pulled together, she watched Bert pulling their life raft out of the cabinet it was kept in and inflating the rubber craft.


“Where’s Jack,” Pete called over as he passed some rope around Donna’s waist.


“Downstairs with the denim girl,” he said, “and he may be thinking of something.”


“Oh great,” Pete said as he dragged Donna towards the hatch, “Let’s hope he’s not got too playful.”  Pushing her down the stairs, he stopped when he heard her cry “Pattie!!”, then took her into the cabin and left her at the side.  IT took a moment for him to reach, Jack, but the first thing he did was pull him off Pattie and push him against the cabin wall.


“Do you want us to really be up shit creek,” he said as he pointed the barrel of his pistol against his colleague’s head.  “Bank robbery is our thing, not rape!”



Pattie was crying, looking at the two men as the stain in the centre of the cloth in her mouth grew wider.  The front of her blouse had been untied, and the cups of her bikini pulled down to reveal her large breasts to the open air, while the front of her shorts had been undone and the material pulled down to reveal her bikini briefs.  The tearstains were running down her cheeks as Bert came down to see what the commotion was.


“Get this shithead out of my sight,” Pete said as he pushed Jack towards their partner, “and make sure you don’t lose sight of him.”  He knelt down at Pattie’s side and pulled the napkin out of her mouth.  “I’m sorry that happened,” he said as he undid the knot and used the dry part of the cloth to dry her tears.  “This must be a bad enough experience for you without that as well.”


“Why are you doing this?” Pattie sobbed as Pete took Donna by the arm and sat her down beside her.  “We needed to make our getaway, and you were in the perfect place,” he said as he pulled Donna’s ankles together and started to bind them with the cord.  “Your friend is safe in the back, and we’ll be out of your hair in a little while.  We’re far enough out that no boat is going to hit you out here.”


“Why would anything hit us,” Donna said as Pete placed her bound ankles on top of Pattie’s and passed more rope around both sets.  He smiled as he secured the knot, then pushed the two girls together and uncoiled a longer length of thicker rope.


“You’ll see”, Pete said as he pulled the loops of rope, bringing the two girls together as they sat there before securing the ends to the seat behind them.  “For now, however, I need to do one last thing.”  The two girls looked at each other as he stood up, went into the bathroom and re-appeared with a roll of white adhesive plaster in his hand.





The dawn had risen over the lake as the speedboat approached the cruiser, the boat bobbing in the wake of the smaller craft as it drew alongside.  The two detectives climbed on board, taking note of the open casket on the deck and the keys that were still located by the side of the steering wheel.


“Is anyone on board,” the younger one called out, to be greeted by the sound of thumping coming from the cabin below.  Nodding to his partner, he descended the staircase, checking with each step if anyone was waiting.  As his partner joined him on the lower area, he called out “This is the police,” which brought muffled screams from either side of the narrow passageway.  Nodding, he made his way to the front of the boat as his partner cautiously went to the rear.  Looking in the door to the front cabin, he holstered his gun and ran to where Pattie and Donna were sitting, screaming at him through their taped lips.


“Hang on, girls,” he said as she took hold of a corner and peeled the tape away from Pattie, then Donna.  Both girls gasped for air as the other policeman brought Kelly through, her arms holding her poncho tightly to her side.


“Angie,” Donna said as their friend sat in a chair, sobbing uncontrollably.  “What about Kelly –we don’t know what happened to her.”


“The other girl – she’s in hospital, which is where we’ll take you three when we get back to shore.  Do you know where they went?”


“I’m sorry,” Donna said as she rubbed her wrists as they were freed from the cord, “they took the life raft and went.”


“All right – let’s get you girls safely home.  One of the officers will take us back,” he said as he nodded to a uniformed officer who had come down, while his partner continued to free them from their ropes.