What If… Beauty and the Best – Silent Night
It is, of course, not the first time the UK has faced
a severe national crisis and a time of work-related strikes. So, What If Beauty and the Best had been
around in the Seventies…
“Does your granny always tell you, that the old songs
are the best…”
Edie Coolidge smiled as she put the final decoration
up on the Christmas tree and stood back.
The sixty-year-old had grey permed hair with a blue rinse through it,
and was wearing a long-sleeved green velvet top, brown bell bottom cut trousers,
and black stack heeled shoes.
“So, we’re ready for another Christmas,” her daughter
Amanda Holmes said as she sat on the couch.
She had dark brown hair, held up in a beehive, and was wearing a short
sleeved red wool dress with a white snowflake pattern at the top, as well as
black stiletto heeled black strap sandals.
“I think so,” Edie said with a smile. “Given that man of yours is stationed in
Ulster, it’s better if we are all together.
Where are the girls anyway?”
“Talking in the bedroom, Mum,” Amanda said, “And Elsie
is preparing the vegetables for dinner.”
“Good – we need to eat by eight and this blasted power
cut,” Edie said as she heard the knock on the front door.
“I’ve got it,” Elsie Coolidge said as she walked past
the door, drying her hands on a tea towel.
The twenty-one-year-old was wearing a tight white roll neck sweater, her
long brown hair falling over her shoulders, brown corduroy pants with a wide
brown leather belt round her waist, and white ankle boots.
Opening the door, she said “hello, how can I help
you?”
“By walking back in, and putting your hands in the
air,” a male voice said, Elsie walking back as the two visitors came in. The man was tall, broad shouldered, and was
wearing a red sweater, blue denim jeans with the cuffs turned up, and brown
shoes. He also had a black mask over his
eyes, and a gun in his gloved hand.
The woman who walked in with him was also wearing an eye
mask. She had curly brown hair and was
wearing a cream-coloured blouse with large wing collar under a brown V-necked
sweater, brown culottes, and knee length burgundy leather boots. She was also wearing gloves, as she said
“sorry, but we’re here to make sure we can get through the next week. Where is Edie Coolidge?”
“I’m Edie Coolidge.”
The masked woman turned to see Edie in the doorway and
pointed the gun in her gloved hand at her.
“Good – look, we don’t want to hurt anyone, so just do as we say, and
everyone will be all right. Please, walk
back in.”
She walked towards Edie as the man took Elsie’s hands
behind her back, and she felt the rubbing on her wrists as he used a length of
brown hemp rope to secure her wrists together.
“Mum – oh god,” Amanda said as she saw the two masked
intruders walk in, and her sister with her hands behind her back.
“Please stay where you are,” the woman said as the man
told Elsie to sit in an armchair, and then walked behind Edie, taking her
wrists behind her back and securing them tightly together as well.
“Please, no – my babies…”
“Stay calm,” the woman said, “where are they?”
“Upstairs in a bedroom…”
As Edie sat down, the masked man walked behind the
couch Amanda was sitting on. “Best, make
sure they stay here – I’ll go and bring the kids back down.”
The man nodded as his partner left the room.
“Best?”
“That is what I am called,” he said as he finished
securing Amanda’s wrists together behind her back, “now, don’t move while I
secure your ankles…”
As the masked woman listened to the door, she smiled as
she heard a young girl say, “of course Santa is real.” Opening the door, she smiled as she said “of
course he is real – and he will come and see you on Christmas Eve. But right now, I need all three of you to
listen to me.”
She looked at the three girls. The youngest was about six and had short
blonde hair. She was wearing a tartan
pinafore dress over an orange long sleeved blouse with a tie neck, white knee
length socks and black Mary Jane shoes.
The next girl was about nine and had on a long dress. The top was a short sleeved white blouse,
with a Peter Pan collar, while the skirt was a red check and came to the floor
where it had a raised hem. The third
girl was about eleven, and was wearing a short sleeved mini dress, orange with
a pop art pattern, as well as knee length brown material boots which were laced
up the front, the topes of a pair of grey socks clearly visible at her knees.
“Who are you,” she said as she looked at the woman.
“Well, they call me Beauty,” she said as she closed
the door, “what do they call you?”
“I’m Mary, these are my sisters, Mandy and Martha.”
“You are Martha,” Beauty said as she looked at the
youngest girl, who nodded as she said, “who are you?”
“Well – I’m a robber,” Beauty said, “and my friend – he’s
The Best – is with your mum, your aunt and your grandmother. Now, that means I have to make sure you can’t
call out or raise the alarm, but I promise you it’s not going to hurt. In fact, it can be fun.”
“Why are you robbing us,” Mandy said quietly.
“Well, I hate to say this,” Beauty whispered as she
brushed Mandy’s hair back with her gloved hand, “but we have bills to pay, food
to buy. Now, I’m afraid I have to start
by tying your hands behind your back – each of you.” She showed them the lengths of brown rope in
her other hand, and said “so, who wants to be first?”
“Look at us Mum!”
“Oh my god,” Amanda said as she saw Mary, Mandy and
Martha walk in, “are you girls all right?”
“We are Mum,” Mary said as they sat on the couch,
“Beauty told us what is going on.”
“She did – are you Beauty?”
“I am – girls., meet The Best.”
“Hello girls,” the tall, masked man said, “can you all
sit still, and I’m going to use some of his rope to hold your ankles together.”
“We’ll be just like you Mummy,” Martha said as she watched
Best tie the rope round her ankles, pulling it tight as it rubbed on her socks.
“Why?” Edie
looked a Beauty and said, “Why do this to us?”
“Beauty says it’s because they have to get money to
live,” Mary said as Best secured her ankles together.
Elsie and Amanda looked at each other, before Edie said,
“you’re robbing us – to survive?”
“Sadly, yes,” Beauty answered as Best stood up, and
went to where he had left a bag, taking out a white scarf and rolling it into a
band as he said “now, I’m going to take you grandmother for a little walk in a
few minutes, but while we’re out of the room, you need to be quiet.
“All of you – so open your mouth, please.”
“Yes, Mister Best,” Martha said as she opened her
mouth, Amanda watching as the masked man cleave gagged her youngest daughter
and tied the scarf tightly round her head – and then did the same to Mandy and
Mary. The three girls grinned over the
band of silk as he then used more scarves to gag their mother and aunt, before
he untied Edie’s ankles and helped her to stand up.
“Come with me,” he said as Beauty stood by the tree.
“Not long until Christmas now girls – excited?”
All three of them nodded as Edie was walked up the
stairs, and into her bedroom.
“Are things really so bad out there that you have to
rob me to pay for food?”
“Are you a member of the Conservative party, Edie?”
“I am – why?”
“Then you must be aware that Mister Heath’s policies
are causing a great deal of hardship – not just with the miners,” Nest said as
he indicated Edie should sit on the bed.
“Now, I have no particular wish to make a mess – tell me where your jewelry
is.”
Shaking her head, Edie said “it’s a state, isn’t it?”
“Power cuts are just the tip of the iceberg, Edie – on
which note, I will tell you that we will leave after the power has been turned
off tonight.”
“Then I need to ask you to do something for all of
us.”
“Of course – now, your jewelry?”
“Start in the wardrobe, there’s a safe – the
combination is…”
“Wmmhhmhmhnghreee.”
Amanda looked at Mary, and then at Beauty as she said
“lhttmhthlk.”
“You promise you will not call for help?”
Amanda nodded as Beauty came over and eased the scarf
from her mouth. As the wet silk landed
on her chest, Amanda said “we need to feed my daughters. When my mother comes back, take me to the
kitchen and I’ll sort some food our for all of us.”
“That sounds like an idea – but food they can eat in
here?”
Amanda nodded as she said “how does Crispy Pancakes
and chips sound, girls? I think your grandmother
has some in the freezer.”
The three girls grinned, the corners of their mouths
showing the dark grey where the scarf had soaked up their saliva, and nodded as
Beauty said, “excellent idea.”
“Wthhhsss?”
“I’m going to cook some tea, Mum,” Amanda said as Edie
sat down, the white scarf sitting between her lips as Best knelt down and
re-tied the rope round her ankles.
“Ghhddhdeee…”
“This is great – thanks Mummy,” Martha said as she ate
a chip, the three girls balancing a plate on a tray on their laps. Their ankles were still secured, but their
arms had been freed.
“You’re welcome,” Amanda said as she sipped her
coffee. “So, what is going to happen when we finish?”
“Actually,” Beauty said, “Best has told me what you
asked Edie, and we shall take care of that.
After all, it is going to get dark for a while.”
“Oh yeah – the power cuts,” Mary said quietly, “so
what are we going to do?”
“Are you all finished?”
As the girls nodded, Beauty took tehri plates and
trays and carried them into the kitchen, as Best untied the legs of all three
girls and Amanda. As they stood up, she
said “come with me. Best, would you
start to set things up in here?”
“They’re in a drawer in the kitchen,” Edie said as
Elsie looked at her.
“What are they going to do?”
“Make sure we are not totally in the dark…”
“So, we get changed,” Amanda said to her daughters,
“and then when we go downstairs, Beauty is going to tie us all up – but we will
all be the same, all right?”
The three girls nodded as Beauty said, “all right –
your grandmother said you would like to wear these, and they will protect your
wrists and ankles.”
Mary nodded as she unlaced her boots and pulled them
off, Amanda helping Mandy and Martha to take their clothes off before she
removed her own shoes and dress. She
then put on a one piece red and white striped sleepsuit; her feet covered by
the attached slippers. It zipped up the
front, as Mary put her feet into the feet of a pair of peach pajama bottoms, bootees
keeping them warm with an elasticated cuff at her ankle. She then pulled over her head the long-sleeved
matching top.
Mandy had put on her own pajamas – green bottoms, and
a top with a green lower half and a white upper half and sleeves, an orange
band round her waist with a bow at the front.
“Can you help me Mandy,” Martha said as her sister
walked over, nodding as she helped the young girl to ease her feet into booties
of the purple bottoms. Her top was also
purple, with a white lace collar.
“Excellent,” Beauty said, “now, I want you al to stand
in a line, and put your hands behind your back.
I’m going to make sure your wrists are tied together, but I’ll put the
rope over the cuffs of your tops, so it feels more comfortable.”
“Thanks,” Mandy said, Amanda watching as one by one
her daughters had their wrists secured together behind their backs.
“You’re very nice for a robber, Beauty,” Martha said.
“Actually, you are - I’m sorry you need to do this to
buy food,” Amanda said as Beauty crossed her wrists behind her back, and then
secured them together with the brown rope.
“What are the four other ropes for,” Mandy asked as
she looked on the bed.
“Let me show you,” Beauty said as she doubled one
over, and then wrapped it round Mandy’s stomach, pulling it tight as her arms
were forced against her sides. She took it
round several times, around her upper arms and her stomach, before she tied the
ends off behind her back.
“Okay – I can see how that works,” Amanda said as Mary
and Martha both had their arms secured to their sides in the same way, before
Beauty did the same thing to her. She
tried not to show how it made her really feel, as she pulled the ropes tight,
the bands framing her chest.
Beauty secured the ropes, and then said “right – we go
downstairs, your aunt and grandmother come up.”
She let all four of them walk out in front of her, as they went down the
stairs and into the main room.
“Ah – well, at least we know what is going to happen
now,” Elsie said as she watched them walk in.
“Indeed – Best, would you kindly take the other two
upstairs and allow the3m to change before you bind them?”
“Of course,” Best said as she untied the legs of Edie and
Elsie and allowed them to walk up the stairs.
“I see the candles are out,” Amanda said as she looked
round the room.
“Indeed – it is important you are not afraid,” Beauty
said with a smile, “but equally importantly, you need to be safe. So, girls, I want you all to sit on the
couch.”
“Come on,” Mary said as they sat down, watching as Beauty
used more brown rope to secure their ankles together at the elasticated cuff,
and then their legs below their knees.
She then used another length of rope to tie Mary’s left arm to Mandy’s
right arm, making sure it was tightly cinched, and then Mandy’s left arm to
Martha’s right arm.
“Have a seat, Amanda,” the masked woman said, their
mother sitting down and watching as Beauty used two more lengths of rope to
secure her ankles together, and her legs below her knees.
As she and the girls twisted their legs round, Beauty
looked at the clock. “7.15 – we need to
make the final preparations soon.”
“We’re ready then.”
The girls said “you look great, Gran, Aunt Elsie” as
Edie and Elsie walked in. Edie was
wearing a peach nightgown, with sleeves that came down to her elbows, and a
skirt that came to her knees, while Elsie was wearing a sleeveless nightdress
which came down to her ankles. Both of
them had their hands behind their backs, and they could see the bands of rope
that held their arms to their sides.
“Indeed – take a seat ladies,” Best said as Edie sat
in a rocking chair next to the couch, and Elsie sat in the other armchair. Beauty knelt down and put Edie’s ankles
together, wrapping the brown rope round them and pulling it tight as Best did
the same to Elsie. They both then
secured the legs of the two women, this time above their knees with the skirts
of their nightdresses gathered under the band.
“There – you won’t be able to mov enow,” Beauty
said. “One more thing.”
“What’s that?”
Thew girls watched as Beauty took a roll of brown
sticking plaster from the bag, tore as trip off, and then pressed it down over
Amanda’s lips. “Tkhhphsqhut,” she
mumbled, the girls nodding as Beauty pressed a length down over each of their
mouths, and then did the same to Edie and Elsie.
Best held up a box of matches, and then started to light
the candles as the girls watched. As he
finished, the clock struck eight, and the lights all went out, the flames of the
candles the only illumination as they reflected on the baubles on the tree.
“Thank you – all of you,” Beauty said as the two of them
left Edie and her family to relax in the lights…
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